Dalam sebuah seminar mengenai bencana, seorang professor dari Cyprus berkomentar tentang gotong royong. “Apa konsep gotong royong itu tidak melanggar Hak Asasi Manusia. Bekerja kok gak dibayar…”
Pembicara dari Indonesia yang dari tadi sumringah berbusa-busa menjelaskan Participatory Development sontak jadi melongo.
Sebelumnya, pembicara Indonesia itu dengan bangga sundul langit menjelaskan tentang partisipasi masyarakat korban gempa Jateng DIY yang diklaim sukses(tentu saja pembicara tidak akan berani menyinggung penanganan gempa di daerah lain yang alot mendad-mendad macam aceh, bengkulu dan nusa tenggara. Apalagi semburan Lumpur lapindo!) Dengan prosentase partisipasi masyarakat 40-60%. Dengan pancingan dana karitas negara BLM(Bantuan Langsung Masyarakat) maksinal 15juta. Bisa menghasilkan bentuk rumah yang kalo di rupiahkan minimal 28,10 juta. Itu minimal lho. Berarti ada rumah yang harganya diatas angka itu. Partisipasi yang bagus kan? Setelah ngomong partisipasi, pembicara menjelaskan rahasia kearifan lokal. Nah, nyampailah ke konsep gotong royong. Kalau di desaku disebut sambatan (dari asal sambat yang berarti mengeluh. Sambatan=keluhan. Dalam pengertian lebih lanjut, sambatan berarti membagi keluhan. Biar ringan keluhan itu ditanggung bersama-sama). Masyarakat bergotong royong mendirikan rumah mereka yang roboh. Dari rumah ke rumah bergantian dikerjakan. Mengaduk semen, mengatur bata, memasak konsumsi dan lain lain. Bayangin di awal rekonstruksi, 570 rumah per hari berdiri! Apalagi selain argumen keampuhan gotong royong sayuk rukun orang desa itu.
Seandainya ada yang musti dicermati dari penanganan bencana di Jateng DIY pasti itu wujud partisipasi masyarakat. Ya gotong royong tadi. Nah, orang cyprus itu malah megajukan isu pelanggaran HAM. Dalam forum, beberapa bule tampak manggut-manggut ikut menganggap isu itu serius. Apa pula pelanggaran HAM, isu gawat banget kan.
Aku melihat pembicara melongo. Tapi selang beberapa detik kemudian klecam klecem cengengesan.
Aku garuk kepala, dahsyat juga tafsir profesor itu. Aku tidak menyangka kalau analisa interpretik profesor itu nyampe ke isu HAM. Gotong royong pasti dibayangkan seperti kerja paksa tanpa upah seperti jaman penjajahan. Negara yang punya otoritas memaksa menerapkan pola itu pada masyarakat. Supaya bekerja menyelesaikan program penanganan bencana rehabilitasi dan rekonstruksi yang diajukan negara. Mereka tidak dibayar. Tafsiran pak profesor itu jauh sekali. Maklum, di negaranya tidak ada gotong royong. Batas wilayah nalar yang belum dikomunikasikan.
Ya yang namanya birokrat, pembicara di depan, seperti mendapat angin segar untuk menjelaskan gotong royong. Dia dengan wibawa dan pesan moral penjaga nama baik negara bercerita gedabus apa itu gotong royong sampai dasar negara( baca: pancasila). Bapak itu bercerita dengan sangat apik tentang nilai-nilai luhur kearifan lokal yang diwariskan nenek moyang. Bahwa nilai gotong royong seperti bentuk partisipasi aktif dalam demokrasi. Bahkan mereka mereka sudah pada tahapan behavior, ihlas berpartisipasi. Kesadaran yang telah terbentuk lama sebelum orang barat menuntut partisipasi aktif(opo iyak?). Aku seperti mendengar seorang customer service bercerita tentang keunggulan produk(bersemangat dan penuh senyum). Boleh, boleh. Lagian aku suka juga dengan konsep gotong royong. Dan menurutku emang harus dikomunikasikan ke semua pihak. Biar tidak ada salah tafsir.
Hmm... bule itu sampai ngangguk-ngangguk lagi, kali ini sambil bilang: great, great!
Di pergantian forum ada acara minum kopi. Disampingku bapak-bapak pake baju batik wakil korban gempa salah satu ketua Pokmas (Pokmas=kelompok masyarakat. Dalam struktur rehab rekon ketua pokmas sangat signifikan penting. Selain rekeningnya digunakan pencairan dana BLM, mereka juga organisator di tingkatan masyarakat). Kami berbincang. Aku bertanya-tanya soal gempa kemarin. Dia bercerita tentang pemotongan BLM itu emang bagian dari kesepakatan(aku menganggap kesepakatan warga itu kearifan lokal). Ya kami para ketua pokmas tidak digaji negara, masak tidak ada uang bensin, uang ganti ngetik surat, fotokopi atau uang lelah. Jadi pemotongan secara sadar dan ihlas dimusyawarahkan dan disepakati. Pembagian di tempat bapak itu menerapkan sistem bagito(bagi roto). BLM dibagi sama rata. Karena wilayahnya sangat rentan dan sensitif. Daripada gegeran mbak, kata bapak itu. Wah kearifan lokal kayak gini yang enggak diforumkan. Riskan kali.
Trus gimana pak waktu mendirikan rumah? Apa tidak bingung cari tukang? Kan semua orang pada mbangun juga.
(dibahasakan ulang sama iz) Hayo bareng-bareng aja mbak. Gantian. Kalo besok di tempat saya dibangun rumahnya, satu RT ikut ngusung boto, ngaduk semen dan sebagainya datang ke tempat saya. Seterusnya begitu juga di tempat tetangga saya. Lha gimana. Wong waktu gempa datang, kami semua pada mbatin, kok yang mbantu gak dateng-dateng. Eh giliran mereka ramai sekali ke desa-desa, halah kok ternyata yang dateng tidak mbantu-mbantu. Kerjaannya gonta-ganti data verifikasi yang bikin warga kisruh..
Hahaha kami tertawa.
(lanjut bapak tadi) Sebagian lagi sudah merasa cukup jadi orang yang membawa logistik di awal hari-hari gempa(sindiran buat gue bangeet..). Lha terus kami ini apa ya terus nunggu logistik dan tinggal di tenda tho mbak.. kesuwen. Kasian anak saya kedinginan tiap malam tidur di tenda. Ya saya cancut taliwondo, ngurusi bantuan. Walah panjang sekali jalurnya tak lakoni mbak.. bantuan itupun tidak cukup, saya harus menjual dua sapi buat mbangun rumah(ck ck partisipasi tingkat tinggi!). lha gimana lagi..
Batinku, wah ternyata sudut pandang gotong royong masyarakat tidak semanis nilai luhur yang diomong para birokrat tadi. Mereka bahkan tidak sekalipun menyinggung visi nilai luhur nenek moyang. Mereka konkrit: supaya permasalahan cepet selesai. Rumah-rumah berdiri. Berpartisipasi demi kepentingan keluarga, anak dan istri. Sip, sip.
Ada yang tertinggal, korban gempa yang Cuma sebagai penerima bantuan. Gimana mereka memaknai partisipasi mereka? Juga intriknya. Kabar burung yang berhembus, ketua pokmas itu paling basah karena rekeningnya digunakan mencairkan dana BLM untuk 10-15 masyarakat. Belum lagi Uang lelahnya. Ah sayangnya, kategori terakhir itu tidak diundang di forum ini.
my close friend told me, whenever i'm in the mode of questioning, have loads to ask, being so curious, longing for answers, i should open divan, hafiz poetry book. it's a persian tradition, people look inside this book to meet their answers. well i don't have that book, and she kindly inform that i can reach it from the net. honestly in the beginning i thought it's kinda superstitious, but ... for the sake of poetry, i think there's nothing to lose. there's nothing to regret on reading a fine poetry, right? so, i opened this. i'm not seriously asking my questions to this site, well, come on... i just let my questions slightly come pass my heart, and there's not just one but few questions...about my scripshit, about "who am i?", my wild dreams, my (smiling/malu oiy) love life :-P well, turns out that good friends' advice is always a special something. now after clicking the button to get the answer, i just wanna say how much i was surprised reading the answer. oh my god, is such thing as 'oracle' do exist?
here is the answer for me, and if you know me that well, you'll be surprised too about me getting this poetry as an answer. i mean, it feels like this poetry is dedicated for me, for me. finally i could say things that are really me. maybe i'm too hysterical, a little creepy i guess to believe in such things. maybe it's just random anyway. well, try it for yourself because for this moment i really think this poetry shows me part of who i am. thanks girl, i miss u :-P
beautiful and shocking poetry (what a combination, ahahah)
Ghazal 233
Till you grant my wish, I won't give up my demand
I will reach the Soul of Souls, or be buried in this land.
When I am dead and buried, open my grave and see
Smoke rising from my corps, by my inner fire fanned.
Show Thy face to the people, awe-struck and radiant
Man and woman will cry out, at Thy smallest command.
I am tired of this life, jealousy eats away my heart
Without a kiss from your lips, I end my worldly errand.
In search of those sweet lips, I have spent my whole life
Desires of the deprived, those lips will reprimand.
In the circles of the Lovers, his goodness they understand,
With reverence, Hafiz's name, they pass from hand to hand.
::little notes for myself, finally .... hwahhh
- yes (admit it, nad), i am that persistent girl, sometimes a stubborn stone headed creature that won't easily give up...giving up is hard for me, 'til i get what i want .... scary, don't you think?
- and yeaahhh ... i'd (come on be honest nad, eventhough it's hard) rather be black or white, meaning: yes or no, something for sure or nothing at all.... i'm not really good at handling that half on-half off-gray area, sorry
- about that grave, i don't know what it means hahahaaa ("open my grave and see" ?) because i don't know what is "fanned". now after looking up to dictionary online
"To stir (something) up by or as if by fanning: fanned the flames in the fireplace; a troublemaker who fanned resentment among the staff." or "(of a breeze, current of air, etc.) to blow upon, as if driven by a fan: A cool breeze fanned the shore" or "to spread out like a fan: The dealer fanned the cards."this details bored you, right? but i need this explanation :-P. maybe that means i would still "be" after i die :-P - for the next lines, maybe it's about "I" having a constant search upon, and a constant feeling of missing "Thy". (what is "merindukan " in english?)
- jealousy? oh no, that's soooo me :-P nothing happened wrong at all, it's just part of me automatically ,,, my reflect response huahahahhahahaahahahahaaaa (evil grin).
- kiss and lips and the next lines, hmm, no need any further conversation, kiss and lips is just the embodiment of "me" huahahahahhaaa
- on a fuller context, i feel this poetry is trying to tell me about great passion,,, if it could be summarized into one word, that word would be passionate (imho). passion drives so "I" won't give up, pursuing for a "the it" (Soul of Souls) or nothing at all, keeping "I" even after death, making "I" full of jealousy, and about that lips and kiss (in it's literarry meaning or not) ..., hmmm, too much (maksude, mungkin orang2 nganggap itu terkesan berlebihan buanget) but bittersweetly true. only a passionate person can accept (i mean, receive) this poetry... i realized that this "passionate-me" is the character i've always tried to avoid.
afterwords: i know i need to read it more and more (repeatedly) to get the meaning, maybe another time. maybe another meaning/new understanding will come to my mind :-P thanks hafiz poetry book :-)
Kamu pasti akan tertawa kencang sekali kalau tahu jawabanku, saat ditanya temen-teman dekatku: kenapa (misalnya) aku harus menikah? Aku meminjam jawabanmu. Padahal waktu itu aku bergidik, ngeri dengan jawaban itu. Aku mengataimu manusia efisien. Semuanya dengan fungsi-fungsi dan kegunaan. Kamu itu manusia ambisius, gila fungsi, kejam dan tidak punya hati. Seolah-olah manusia hanya seperangkat alat yang akan membereskan sesuatu. Jahat sekali kan... Tapi waktu itu aku berpikir akan mencoba menjadi kamu. Memakai jawabanmu. Biar hidup ini lebih konkret dan efisien. Bukankah kamu bilang hidup adalah segenggam strategi? Aku mencoba. Barangkali seperangkat fungsi akan memudahkan hidupku.
Iya, benar sekali yang kamu bilang. Ternyata, aku tidak sekuat itu meletakkan fungsi, lebih tepatnya aku tidak sekejam kamu. (Bukan pembunuh berdarah dingin katamu? Istilah itu legendaris lho!) Bahkan, aku tidak seberani kamu meletakkan fungsi dalam agenda kedekatan.
Dan kamu mengataiku manusia fantasi. Manusia yang tidak pernah riil. Penuh tipu daya dan tidak konkret. Seperti melangkah di awang-awang setiap harinya. Berangkat dari eksperimen demi eksperimen. Kamu emang sangat kejam mengataiku.
Hingga aku membuat kesimpulan, kamu kejam dan aku penuh tipu daya. Ah, kejahatan yang sempurna. Aku seperti berhasil menemukan kutu ditumpukan bantal usang. Seolah olah menemukan satu-satunya hal yang menyamakan.
”Gak ada yang pernah sama, Zah...” katamu dalam kepulan asap kretek Dji Sam Soe yang sebelumnya kamu ketuk-ketuk batangnya di meja.
Tiba-tiba aku menganggap pertengkaran itu manis sekali.
Aku jadi panas dingin kalau perdebatan di warung seafood itu diingat-ingat. Kecuali perjalanan ngebut sampai semua pembicaraan di terbangkan hawa dingin, aku ngerasa hal-hal yang terjadi di sana tidak ingin kuulangi. Supaya jadi satu-satunya.
Aku mulai terbiasa berbeda dan tidak perlu menyamakan diri denganmu. Kamu pikir, aku berjalan di udara. Sedangkan aku kira, kamu telah tenggelam dalam tanah yang kamu gali sendiri. Aku berdiri di atas fantasi dan kamu di atas fungsi. Masing-masing diri kita seperti membicarakan rumput tetangga.
Hingga tiga bulan lalu, telepon itu terputus dalam cerita yang belum kuselesaikan. Intonasimu tidak terlalu kukenali(intonasi yang selalu kutertawakan parole-nya), lebih lambat dari biasanya...Di tempatku, waktu itu, tidak ada sinyal. Aku pun tidak telepon balik. Padahal, aku tidak tahu apa motifmu menelepon pagi hari. Di waktu, yang kamu tahu, aku tidak suka dihubungi.
Kemarin malam, dari Belia, aku mendapat kabar, kamu akan menikah bulan ini. Aku tidak kaget.
O iya, apakah alamat imel yang kamu kasih ke aku itu salah? Imel yang kukirim tertolak. Padahal aku masih punya janji. Nomer hapemu tidak aktif lagi. Iya, aku emang teledor padamu soal janji itu.
Met menikah, manusia efisien! Kamu orang berani. Bukan aku, tapi kamu yang spesial. Lebih banyak orang sepertiku mengendap-endap tertawan di udara daripada sepertimu yang tenggelam di tanah yang digali sendiri. Kamu orang baik. Kamu harus percaya padaku, kalau idealisasi sebagian besar manusia itu emang kejam berkeyakinan sepertimu. Bukan pecundang membingungkan sepertiku.
Kamu orang yang paling efisien sejauh ini.
Tapi aku mau bilang, ada kenyataan lain yang tidak bisa dibereskan dengan fungsi. Emang agak mistik sih.
Met menikah. Met menikah. Semoga selalu diberkati.
Sebentar, biar kutebak: kamu menikah dengan adik seniormu itu kah?
believe it or not, last night i got a dream about my vox blog. that's weird, maybe i've abandoned this site for too long, so it came slowly but surely into my dream. i'm not forgetting you, you know? (heheh, talking to vox). it's just a little technical problem which i've mentioned before, about the computer lab where i couldn't access you (vox). unfortunately i'm broke, so i must try all the way to maintain my financial condition to remain on this amount, because i'm wage-less now, like, at all. so, even for going to an internet cafe, which is not free of charge, i'll think twice and triple times. i prefer public and free internet service, and computer lab (pptik) is the answer.
you know, what's visualised on our dreams are not strictly consistent with what's really happened on our daily life now and then. on my dream last night, this vox blog turned colour into pink. i've never ever even considered pink as my vox colour. no offense, some people may think it's lovely, but for me, pink on a blog is just way too girly. eventhough options provided here is only pink on a magenta tone, but still, no.. no.. thankyou. this black is beautiful in my opinion, don't you agree? everything seem so vivid like a fluorescence.
anyway, yesterday i've had a toefl-like test trial. it's on a cd package so we could try this test at home. i've only try the listening part, because the cd is not mine. and, this trial revealed how amateur i was. i got 50 questions, and only 42 correct answers. haahhaaahaa. i need to practice my concentration, of course. because, i got bored after 12 questions so i played around hahahahaaa.
we can see the result after taking this trial. some of my wrong answer are purely my mistake (i thought my answer was correct but false), but most of it, i knew right after clicking the answer that my choice was wrong, and i knew the right one, but it's too late to change my answer. and, it was wrong. so, lesson learned: i need to take my time, relax, don't be too hurried up and rushed to click answers. think first, answer later :-D.
you know what made me on the vibe of losing time while i was taking this test? because there's a timer on the corner of the computer, and i was thinking...wow, only few minutes left but there's still a lot of question i need to answer, and i thought the "soal" (conversation) is also counted on our timer. but, no, it was only my amateur-ish assumption. actually the timer stopped when the conversation was going on. and i thought it would need a minute minimal for each question. waaaay wrong, it only take approximately five to ten seconds for each question. so in the end i got 12 minutes left. what a waste of time.
it was a fun experience by the way. i'm addicted already. a good addiction, eh? hahahahaa :-D
Today is my second day in home, I couldn't go to my college because my grandma is sick. I need to look after her, be there in her side. Sometimes, I always think, '' Why would God make my grandma to suffer like this ? What's the point ? '' The religious answer is that : All of the joy and pain in this world are brought by God, just to test us. Would that be my grandma have commited too many sins in her life ? Looks like we are the toy of God. Even we do something bad or good, should God care for us ? God is powerful, and it is up to him to decide who will be throwed into the hell or brought up into the heaven... S**t !
Even God himself makes me to think and speak of this......... so don't blame on me. Everything is up to God.
You're such an inspiration for the ways
That I'll never ever choose to be
Oh so many ways for me to show you
How the savior has abandoned you
Fuck your God
Your Lord and your Christ
He did this
Took all you had and
Left you this way
Still you pray, you never stray
Never taste of the fruit
You never thought to question why
It's not like you killed someone
It's not like you drove a hateful spear into his side
Praise the one who left you
Broken down and paralyzed
He did it all for you
He did it all for you
Oh so many many ways for me to show you
How your dogma has abandoned you
Pray to your Christ, to your god
Never taste of the fruit
Never stray, never break
Never---choke on a lie
Even though he's the one who did this to you
You never thought to question why
Not like you killed someone
It's Not like you drove a spiteful spear into his side
Talk to Jesus Christ
As if he knows the reasons why
He did it all for you
Did it all for you
He did it all for you..
'' It is wrong always, everywhere, and for everyone, to believe anything upon insufficient evidence. ''
- William Kingdon Clifford -
'' My view is that if there is no evidence for it, then forget about it. An agnostic is somebody who doesn't believe in something until there is evidence for it, so I'm agnostic. ''
- Carl Sagan -
Let me tell you all this :
My faith is based on science and logic. You want me to believe something, so show me the valid proof. If not, I wouldn't believe any dogma.
Talked with Zakuan using my celcom credit yesterday, so me in short time because it is too expensive. OK, Zakuan asked me to go out with him again. He told that he had saw so many magical things during the '40 days out'. I'm went insane... really disturbing moment when we went on about hereafter...
Someone please help me, what does it meant by :
1. God
2. Hereafter
3. Virtue
4. Sin
5. Angel
6. Demon
7. Soul
8. Life
We shall have a discussion : discuss it mataphorically and scientifically. Thanks.
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